Christmas Countdown : The Day

It's Christmas day. I woke up this morning and my christmas wish was just yesterday would never happen. I told him that I liked him, and he was speechless then he left. But I do, I do like him - both as my lover and my friend. It was weird, it was awkward, and I just, I just didn't know why I said that.

"Merry Christmas, C!" Mrs. Cleverly was the one who wished me a merry Christmas, though this christmas I found it... Um.. 

"Wish you all guys have a merry christmas too!" I said to them. We were on the living room. There were Logan and Mr. Cleverly that I thought was watching The Shoes for Christmas on Channel 1. I woke up late, but they were all seemed waiting for me.

"C, finally you woke up! so it's time to unwrapped the gifts Santa Claus has given to you both," Mr. Cleverly said to me. Yes, there were some gifts under the christmas tree, and yes now I didn't believe on Santa Claus anymore, but yap I just did it to respect all the love they gave.

We gathered around the Christmas tree, the big Christmas tree we decorated few weeks ago. The gifts were all big, and wrapped.

I got two : one from Mr and Mrs Cleverly and one from Logan. Logan's parents gave me some books, and Logan gave me a diary. And there was a caption : no more fight.

I thanked them. And we had a great morning here. But yap it all still weird cause Logan and I didn't chat each other. And the conversations were all ain't pretty. 

And there was something missing because my family wasn't there. I missed them. I didn't expect a christmas day like this : there's no family, all the conversations weird, and me and Logan had a fight, and I told Logan that I liked him. It was disaster. It was too bad. It was like not Christmas day at all.

***

"Merry Christmas," I came into the basement again, and there was Logan. He smiled to me as he said, "Merry Christmas too, C."

I sat on the sofa where he sat. He played Christmas songs. The basement was actually the place where he sleeps or aka his room.

I wanted to say something to him. I wanted to thank him for everything, I wanted to fix the weirdness we had.

"C, I wanna say sorry to you for everything I did to you," and finally he said something right when I wanted to talk to him.

"Well that should be me who said sorry to you," I said.

"No, C. It all happened because of the thing I never told you," he said, "I'm so sorry."

But I just don't understand what he was saying. So he did hide something. But why did he hide that? He said to me that I'm his best friend, and so is he. 

I said nothing, "What thing? Why didn't you tell me? I thought I was your best friend. You said it to me, you said it to me. Why didn't you tell me, Logan?" I asked him. But he just looked into my eyes, and he said nothing. He smiled to me, his beautiful smile.

I was sad that time. I was disappointed, but who am I for him? I was noone. But am I wrong in the day like this - the christmas time I want him to just be honest to me?

"Hey, C don't be sad. I'm just, I just don't like to lie to you or doing something that make you disappointed but I have to do this."

"Okay, that's okay, Logan if you don't wanna tell me but I'm sorry too for the thing I said yesterday and..."

"No, C. I'm.." but he stopped.

I was quiet. 

He took a deep breath, "Honestly C, I like you. I love you, C. And to be honest to you, you are the first one who made me feel this way. You are the one who changed my life. And I don't wanna disappoint you." 

I was speechless. He likes me, I like him. I felt so happy that he loves me too as the way I feel to him. And was that the truth he tryna tell me? Why didn't he just say it to me?

But if you loved me
Why'd you leave me?
Take my body
Take my body

All I want is
And all I need is
To find somebody
I'll find somebody like you

We stayed in the quiet of the basement. The truth, we all drowned inside the truth.   That was absolutely the amazing truth for us.

"So that was the truth? Then why did.."
I asked but stopped because Logan interrupted me, "That was not the truth, C."

"So what's the truth?" 

He didn't say anything for a while. He looked like sad, and seemed like he didn't wanna say it.

"You are the far cousin of mine, C." he sobbed. I shocked.

So Logan is my far cousin? He is both my lover and my cousin? We love each other and we are cousins?

"I'm sorry, C. I'm truly deeply sorry because I didn't tell you since the day we first met. I'm so sorry. I'm so so sorry," he said to me. And I sobbed, slowly I cried. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, C," he hugged me after that. I felt the warmth, the heartbeat he has, and I could feel that he truly loves me.

"I'm sorry too, Logan," I said to him.

***

The lights on the christmas tree turned on. The colours made this Christmas more incredible, more glorious, and more colourful. The Christmas I had this year was different. And I'm so grateful that I could spend it here though without my family. 

The smell of the turkey Logan's mom cooked (again) smelled great. The dining room was decorated by some christmas things. 

It was the night of December, 25. When all the truth was finally revealed, when the Christmas felt different than few years ago's. And the day when I knew when at least Logan loves me.

Before we had the dinner Logan said to me, "Besties? Cousins? Lovers?"

I looked into his eyes, "All of them." And after that I hugged him. 

We had an incredible night. The laughters , the jokes, the musics, and the stunning dishes fill the night. And I knew if that was one of my best days ever.

Maybe Christmas is about the truth that revealed, the love that we got from the family and lover, the laughters and the things we love. Maybe Christmas is when we do all the things we love with the people we love. Maybe Christmas is when we experience the imperfection, the simplicity, and the love. And maybe...

Knock.. Knock.. Knock..

Someone opened the door, then they said, "COURTNEY!!!!!" They ran to me. I shocked and happy at the same time.

... Christmas is about the surprise, the very special surprise you've never imagined.

THE END.

PS : The italic words are the lyrics of All I Want by Kodaline. 
And there will be a chapter that explain the truth. 

***

Helll guys. Thanks for reading this Christmas Countdown. Sorry for all the weirdness, the mistakes, and the other things. Hope you guys like it.

And anyway, Merry Christmas🎄🎅🎉 May you have wonderful time this year. God bless each one of you!!😇😘❤️😁😀

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